Prostate Toys: How to Choose Your First

Once you know the prostate is worth exploring — and it very much is — the next question is which toy. The market runs from simple to high-tech, and the right first choice makes all the difference between “oh, that’s what everyone means” and a frustrating fumble. This is a buying guide: if you want the how-to first, start with our prostate play basics, then come back here to choose your gear.

The one feature that matters most: the curve

The prostate sits a couple of inches in, toward the front (belly side) of the body, so the defining feature of a good prostate toy is a curved or angled tip that reaches it without any guesswork. A straight toy makes you do the aiming; a well-shaped prostate massager does it for you. That’s the single most important thing to look for.

The main styles

Hands-free “come-hither” massagers (the Aneros-style shape) are designed to move gently with your body’s own contractions — you clench and relax and the toy does a subtle internal massage. Brilliant for a slow, meditative build, and a favourite first prostate toy.
Vibrating prostate massagers add a motor for stronger, more direct sensation — and because silicone transmits vibration far better than soft jelly, a quality silicone toy delivers noticeably more. Many have a second arm that buzzes the perineum from outside.
Prostate-specific dildos give you full control of depth and rhythm for in-and-out motion, if you prefer to drive.
Remote or app-controlled versions hand the controls to a partner — lovely for couples.

What else to check

A flared base is non-negotiable on any anal toy — always. Beyond that: body-safe silicone, rechargeable, and a size that’s honest about your experience — start slim and moderate; you can always upgrade once you know you love it. Browse the range in prostate stimulators, and pair any of them with plenty of thick lube — the rectum doesn’t self-lubricate, so lube is doing the real work. New to anal entirely? Our anal training guide helps you build comfort first.

While you’re here: the realistic dildo

Here’s something we see all the time and nobody talks about: a lot of guys who get into prostate play also end up wanting a good realistic dildo — and there’s genuinely nothing to overthink. A lifelike dong with a suction or flared base is a brilliant hands-free way to control depth and angle on your own terms (and, frankly, it feels great). If you want the real-deal version, the Signature Cocks line is moulded directly from real performers — and whose it is doesn’t matter in the slightest. Gay star, straight star, doesn’t change how it feels; pick the one that appeals and enjoy it. Pleasure isn’t an identity test.

Frequently Asked Questions

What should I look for in my first prostate toy?

A curved or angled tip (to reach the prostate on the front wall), a flared base, body-safe silicone, and a modest size. A hands-free “come-hither” massager or a gently vibrating silicone one are both excellent starting points.

Are vibrating or non-vibrating prostate massagers better?

Neither is “better” — they’re different. Hands-free massagers give a subtle, meditative build that moves with your body; vibrating ones give stronger, more direct sensation (and silicone carries that vibration best). Many people end up enjoying both.

Why does a prostate toy need a flared base?

Because the anus has no natural stopping point, every anal toy must have a flared base or retrieval handle so it can’t be drawn in too far. It’s the single non-negotiable safety feature.

What size prostate toy should a beginner get?

Slim and moderate. Comfort and the right shape matter far more than size, and you can always size up later. Use plenty of thick lube and go slowly, especially the first few times.

Beginner-friendly picks

Where to go next

Prostate Play Kit — a beginner-forward prostate set
The Anal Starter Kit — the gentler general starter
All Bundles & Kits — curated sets for every occasion
More from Learn · Buying Guides

This article is general educational information, not medical advice. Everyone's body is different — if you have pain, a health condition, or specific concerns, please talk to a qualified healthcare provider.